Did You Ever Think Life Was Gonna Be This Way?

There's something to be said for safety, especially when you've been living in a state of total uncertainty for almost three years. Im not talking about me, this time. I know my safe spaces - I can retreat into a book, into a couple of glasses of wine, into coloring or online card games or knitting. I can take a long bubble bath and pretend the whole time that I am just living the life of a rich housewife.  But safe spaces aren't as accessible for my children. Oftentimes, they don't even realize they're looking for one.  Even with that in mind, mydaughter, I think, has fared better. She knows the details of my illness, and she knows how to duck and cover, whether that be in the library or with a teacher or merely by bouncing her ever present purple ball in the basement or the backyard. But for F, it's so much harder. Here's a kid who was told his mama had advanced cancer just a few weeks after he turned four. In other words, it has been the foundation and ba