Hello, Summer (Cancer Post)

First, some background if you're just meeting me:

I was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer (with metastasis to the liver and possibly the lungs) in April of 2013. I was 38 at the time - I mean, really. WTF? I don't even sit around eating hamburgers. I was a pescatarian and former yoga instructor. So, lucky me, I just happened to win the really shitty cancer lottery. Anyway, my husband and I assembled a kick-ass medical team and they swung into action quickly: colon surgery in May, chemo in June and early July, a month off to recover from that, and then a liver resection. They removed a little over half of my liver...but don't worry, it grows back. There were some complications there, the main being that the surgeon accidentally stapled shut my IVC - twice! - while they were closing up my liver. My kidneys sort of shut down and I gained 40 pounds of water weight within 5 days after surgery, but they sent me home anyway and it took them three weeks to figure out what had happened. (Thank you to my oncologist, who is the one that ordered the tests that led to the discovery.)

After that all cleared up, I had more chemo and was declared NED ("no evidence of disease") at the end of December 2013. My "real life" could now commence, right? No. Wrong. On February 7th, 2014 a CT scan revealed recurrence - two new spots in my liver. I freaked out a little and then we got back to work. This time, instead of liver surgery, I underwent a procedure called SBRT, and then we started a new kind of chemo, for 15 weeks. I finished my last infusion a couple of weeks ago, and my latest CT scan showed no new lesions.

Now that all of that fun info is out of the way:

Since I've already had one recurrence, my oncologist is being very conservative and has scheduled another CT scan for August, right before school starts (I'm a professor, and last time I was 5 weeks into the semester, which made things really complicated). The only other tests they wanted to do on me was some blood work in early July. Well, hey, it's early July, and I had blood work this morning, to check things like platelet levels, white blood cell counts, and so on. They also do a test for a tumor marker called a CEA - this blood test has proven helpful in identifying the existence of tumors in certain kinds of cancer, including mine.

This number makes me insane with worry. My doctor says it shouldn't be taken too seriously because it's not always right, and in my case the SBRT may be leading to higher readings, but last time I had recurrence, my CEA number was up from a 2.7 (normal range is 0-3) to 3.9. So I was on pins and needles this morning when I went into the hospital for my labs. Good news: everything came back okay, and the CEA number was down a smidge from my last reading (3.7) to 3.6. Phew. NOW I finally feel like it's summer! I'm sure I'll start worrying about the scan in August, but to have weeks stretching out ahead of me worry-free, well, I love that.

My recurrence has taught me that once you have cancer, especially an advanced cancer like mine, that you don't just flip the page and say, "Oh, well, that's all done. Let's move on." I can still say "FUCK YOU!" to cancer, and I have done that, but I've changed my mindset. It's basically a 50/50 shot whether I'll have another recurrence, and finding that last recurrence sent me into a really depressive tailspin that lasted for weeks, so I can't afford to think it's "all over with," although I know many of my family members and friends would like to think so. The good news is that my medical team is on top of this, I'm being pro-active by exercising, eating right, and lowering my stress levels. If there is another recurrence, I'm optimistic that we will be able to deal with that one, too. There are so many fantastic options out there for treatment, and I'm working with one of the top doctors in the nation.

Now I think I'll go prop my feet up - doctor's orders, I'm having a bout of edema - and read a good book. Happy summer, everyone!